We choose what we want to put our focus on. We choose where we're heading when put our energy in our focus.
"Most people don't realize how much passion they put into what they don't want. When you speak to a friend and you tell them all about an "awful" situation, you are putting passion into what you don't want. When you react to an event negatively, with the response that it is "terrible", you are putting passion into what you don't want. You are a beautiful passionate being, so make sure you direct your passion wisely."
- Rhonda Byrne
If you choose to focus on what you don't like, then you'll get more of what you don't like. This has nothing to do with a magic thinking, it's just the plain facts. Even if you don't want to see it, you'll get what you focus on.
You are in charge. No ones can choose for you.
If you complain all the time, you'll get more reason to complain.
What is it that you really want? And I mean, REALLY WANT!
Take the time to write it down. Yes, write it down Right Now!
You'll need to focus on what you want. If you haven't done this before, it could take you a long time to make it a habits. So, every evening before you go to sleep and every morning when you wake up, read what you just wrote. Try to see in your head what you want. Feel good about it. And then go on with your day. Keep doing this each day, and I mean EACH DAY for 30 days. After those 30 days, you should have created a habits of doing this. And if you stop for one day, then you have to start again your 30 days from the day one. You can't create a habit if you're not doing this.
And I don't mean that you'll get what you want in 30 days, what I mean is that you'll have the habits of starting your day and ending it with good though about what you want. Those good though will change your mind set and help you to focus on what you want. And then, when your focus will be what you really want, that's when you'll get it.
This is not easy. It needs a lot of work.